Country Cottage Arts

 Saturday, 5 March  2011


My trusty Kodak camera which I had been using for the last 3 years played out on me in the midst of clicking away.  Having no choice but to buy a new one, I finally bought another one. Problem is, I can't seem to transfer the pictures  from the new camera ( hey !, I did try and try and try  on my own  first.  I'm not that ' ulu ' you know ! ) until I get hold of my daughter to show me again.


Anyway, by way of compensation of the pictures, I received a few good jokes via my email  and thought I'd share them  with my readers . .. ............................................. have a hearty laugh on me folks !

One Night 4 college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.
In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.
So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they would be ready by that time.
On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.
The Test consisted of only 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks.
Q.1. Your Name......................... (2 MARKS)
Q.2. which tyre  burst  ? (98 MARKS)
a) Front Left
b) Front Right
c) Back Left
d) Back Right.....!!!

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A worn out wife's poetry goes like this ...




And not to be outdone, the husband's one goes like this ...



                                                         HUSBAND:
                        The rain makes all things beautiful.
                                           The grass and flowers too.
                                     If rain makes all things beautiful
                                         Why doesn't it rain on you?

  
                                      

                                                                   88888888888888888888

Now, this is a specially tailored ( I think this should be made compulsory )  seminar which all would be husbands and existing ones should attend..................................................................


 WICOE

  (Women In Charge Of Everything)

    Is proud to announce the opening of its

EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!
OPEN TO MEN ONLY
ALL ARE WELCOME

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS
Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?
Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR
Practising with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE;
DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK
OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?
Debate among a panel of experts.

REMOTE CONTROL
Losing the remote control - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS
Starting with looking in the right place
Instead of turning the house upside down while screaming -
Open forum


DAY TWO

EMPTY MILK CARTONS;
DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?
Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH;
BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH
PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST
Real life testimonial from the one man who did

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY
AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?
Driving simulation

LIVING WITH ADULTS;
BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN
YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR PARTNER
Online class and role playing

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION
Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES
& CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE
Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT;
LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME
Individual counsellors available.



And my last one for the day, is in the form of  pictures which says,  well,  you make it out yourself ...........................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!